Most may not believe it, as they believe that they are always giving to others and that they are the masters of givers, but NO, that is not the mere definition of giving.
It is again, the season of giving; well, there is no specific season for real giving anyway, as one can give at any time of the year but I was just connecting it to the festivity surrounding as Christmas looms near.
Giving is something that is easy to say but not that easy to be done, despite the perceptions of many who think they have been giving a lot to others and that they are above others whom they considered as the ones who are 'selfish'.
However, what truly constitutes as giving?
A real giving is without any string attached; there should not be any condition imposed when you really give.
A real giver gives because they want to, not because they HAVE to or NEED to, as required.
A gift from someone's heart can be felt by the receiver, and it is just pure and sincere.
Sadly, not everyone does this as most strives to be charitable and it seemed to be more like a competition rather than a real act of giving.
There are a lot of people who give because it is an expectation of them, and they do not want to appear like they are selfish as it could tarnish their self-image in front of others.
Deep inside, they may not really want to, but at the same time, they are struggling with the possibility of being labeled as a cheapskate or a scrooge and they do not want such an image.
It is like there is this battle they are having with their own self.
People who did not give freely and under such conditions, usually will feel void inside and not fully happy. They tend to expect the receiver to be reciprocate their giving by giving back.
For example, if the giver gave a vase to the receiver which is valued at more than a few hundred bucks, and the receiver also returned another gift but is priced only 10 bucks, the first giver would be so pissed and annoyed and judge that the receiver is such a cheapskate.
However, in the first place, if you are just going to give, for goodness sake, DON'T EXPECT!
I get tired of how some people judge you by what or how much of a gift you have for them, after what or ALL they have done for you.
In the first place, you could have said NO? (Look up the definition of the word in the dictionary if you don't know)
I hate it when you ask people for help and they're like, "Of course, that's what friends/family are for!"
Yeah, right, and then once they are there to help you, they start to judge you by what you do for them, or whether you arrange this or that for them and start complaining that you are such an ungrateful person. Yes, just because you don't meet their expectations of what you SHOULD be doing.
It is funny, and I find the whole thing just absurd and freaking hilarious because these folks are just so full of themselves that they don't even realize it and they thought of themselves as saints or angels and that people ought to worship the ground they walk on.
Yes, people like these do exist and you'd be surprised that no one is an exception, even those who claimed that they are religious and strong in their faith.
People who pray continuously, attend masses in church, go to temples, read the Bible, join prayer groups, volunteer at the churches/temples, joining charity and fund raising activities, are a few, who are also, not excluded from the above examples, which is what made it all the more ridiculous as these people preach to others to give, give and give.
It is what is being taught in religions that we should find the joy in giving more than receiving, and it is true, IF you truly understand the real art of giving.
People who go to church/temple complain about people who don't do the same as them, but let me ask you this, if you are doing it willingly, why do you need to care if others do the same?
People who give/help when others ask but complain when they are declined the help they need when it's their turn and they turn to bitch about those so-called 'ungrateful idiots' but hey, if you give with your heart, you won't even remember who are the ones you gave because you wanted to give to them.
People who appear when you ask them to, but then expect you to answerable and that there should be a proper reward or compensation. If you ask me, I'd rather they don't appear at all.
Giving is NOT about obligation, it is a natural act of kindness and it must truly come from the heart. It is like the fundamental principle of giving, and more people should really try to understand what it means to give before giving, and not just to fulfill some general perception or expectation.
It is better to give with the heart and without expectation, or just don't give at all.
It doesn't matter if people think you are just selfish or mean, because either way, you just can't please everyone and don't give if you don't want to.
Just do everyone a favor, and don't, because nobody wants to hear about your misery when your recipient does not reciprocate.
Indeed, the art of giving is a truly an art, or a skill, which many has yet to grasp...